These past six weeks have flown by in a blur. I had applied for a job that I have wanted for more than a decade. Now don't get me wrong, I would not trade these past twelve years I have had home with the kids for anything, but I haven't been home exclusively. I have run my own business for more than a decade. There have been some definite pluses, autonomy, flexibility, and pride. But there are also drawbacks, financial uncertainty and no benefits are two. So, when this opportunity popped up, I jumped at it. To my surprise I was offered the job, with less than 10 days to close down my practice. Many late nights and early mornings later, my last project was done, and I began a new professional chapter.
Unfortunately, my training plan went out the window. And as a result, I had a really crappy half marathon in Vegas. Suffice it to say, the full marathon seems impossible. So when the opportunity came up to run the half, I took it. Part of me is sad that I will forfeit the Mickey medal, but my health and safety come first. It will be great to concentrate on losing weight and reading the word without the pressure of the race. So stay tuned.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
Sunday, November 4, 2012
Filling in the Blanks
A week ago I finished up a large work project just in time for Hurricane Sandy to hit. I was concerned that I would have to drive it up to the courthouse, which was located ninety minutes away. Before getting in the car, however, I placed a call to the clerk of the court. He allowed me to e-mail it up and overnight the package by mail. What a welcome relief.
I also had a small project to complete that morning - in addition to finishing the laundry and putting dinner in the crock pot. By 4:00 p.m., we were ready for the power outage that never came. I am not complaining. Because our neighborhood gets very dark, all of the wind and nearby trees, it was a frightening night. I was glad I had Michael Westen to keep me company. I had recorded a full season of Burn Notice - my new guilty pleasure. With school cancelled the next morning, I didn't matter that I was awake most of the night.
This past week, I also wrote and submitted my chapter for a book contest. It is a serial book that will be posted on a blog starting in early December. There are seven authors, and one open guest author spot that will contribute to the Christmas story. I hope to be that eighth author.
After the high of completing the large work project, and high of a new fun writing project, my eating and exercise grew old and boring. I managed to keep up with the bare minimum, and even indulged in some candy and vino.
For Halloween, we went to a large neighborhood in town. Our own neighborhood hayride did not occur and most of the kids all trucked across town to see what the deal was with mass trick-or-treating. For the first time, I allowed Kat to go off on her own with some friends, who lived in that neighborhood. She had her phone and they had to text every fifteen houses. She proved herself to be very responsible and had fun being grown up.
Ry, on the other hand, was not comfortable in a new neighborhood. Whether it was because he was not invited to trick-or-treat with friends, or just was not into something different, he sat on the steps of our friend's house with us ladies and watched the trick-or-treaters. We encouraged him to go, but he was having none of it. In the end, we bought him his own 10 pack of kit kat bars, and called it even. We did not force K to share her candy - she earned it and should keep it. But, as a kind sister, she did toss him a few treats. I was proud of her.
This past weekend was Kat's soccer tournament. They placed second in their division and had to face the third place team.
Kat plays fullback - and is a solid defender. I can count on one hand the number of times she has played offense, and has never scored a goal. While she is a silent and dependable player, the spotlight is rarely on her. She is also the kind of kid that does not show fear or nerves. She watches horror movies, reads scary books and rarely jumps. She is at all times on and off the soccer field cool as a cucumber.
After a full game and two overtime periods, the score was still 0-0. So we all headed down the hill for penalty kicks. My folks drove out to watch her, and Kat shouted out "I'm taking one."
I must confess, that I have played the scenario of Kat kicking a penalty kick (PK) in my head dozens of times. Each time imagining that she is the fifth person to take the shot. Each team shoots five shots. Since she is usually so calm, I could picture the coach making her the anchor. So, when I heard she was taking a PK, I knew they would make her shot five. And she was.
I prayed for her to be calm, have peace regardless of the outcome but, I also prayed that she make her shot. Our first player missed, the other team made their shot. The next three girls for each side scored. Kat stepped up to take her shot. We were behind 3 goals to 4. The pressure was all on her. Hit it, each team picks another player in sudden death. Miss it and we go home. As team photographer, I focused the camera on her, and never moved. She watched the ref waiting for her to blow the whistle giving her the green light to shoot. She ran up to the ball and kicked. Through the camera I saw her hands shoot up and in the background saw her team jumping in the air. YES!! She made it.
The other team missed their shot, and we went into sudden death. I'll spare the drama and say we won the shootout and advanced to the finals today. Unfortunatley, we lost 2-1. I was not bothered by the loss, it was a close game and the girls played well. I'll always be happy that she had that opportunity and that she succeeded. I'm super proud of her!!
I also had a small project to complete that morning - in addition to finishing the laundry and putting dinner in the crock pot. By 4:00 p.m., we were ready for the power outage that never came. I am not complaining. Because our neighborhood gets very dark, all of the wind and nearby trees, it was a frightening night. I was glad I had Michael Westen to keep me company. I had recorded a full season of Burn Notice - my new guilty pleasure. With school cancelled the next morning, I didn't matter that I was awake most of the night.
This past week, I also wrote and submitted my chapter for a book contest. It is a serial book that will be posted on a blog starting in early December. There are seven authors, and one open guest author spot that will contribute to the Christmas story. I hope to be that eighth author.
After the high of completing the large work project, and high of a new fun writing project, my eating and exercise grew old and boring. I managed to keep up with the bare minimum, and even indulged in some candy and vino.
For Halloween, we went to a large neighborhood in town. Our own neighborhood hayride did not occur and most of the kids all trucked across town to see what the deal was with mass trick-or-treating. For the first time, I allowed Kat to go off on her own with some friends, who lived in that neighborhood. She had her phone and they had to text every fifteen houses. She proved herself to be very responsible and had fun being grown up.
Ry, on the other hand, was not comfortable in a new neighborhood. Whether it was because he was not invited to trick-or-treat with friends, or just was not into something different, he sat on the steps of our friend's house with us ladies and watched the trick-or-treaters. We encouraged him to go, but he was having none of it. In the end, we bought him his own 10 pack of kit kat bars, and called it even. We did not force K to share her candy - she earned it and should keep it. But, as a kind sister, she did toss him a few treats. I was proud of her.
This past weekend was Kat's soccer tournament. They placed second in their division and had to face the third place team.
Kat plays fullback - and is a solid defender. I can count on one hand the number of times she has played offense, and has never scored a goal. While she is a silent and dependable player, the spotlight is rarely on her. She is also the kind of kid that does not show fear or nerves. She watches horror movies, reads scary books and rarely jumps. She is at all times on and off the soccer field cool as a cucumber.
After a full game and two overtime periods, the score was still 0-0. So we all headed down the hill for penalty kicks. My folks drove out to watch her, and Kat shouted out "I'm taking one."
I must confess, that I have played the scenario of Kat kicking a penalty kick (PK) in my head dozens of times. Each time imagining that she is the fifth person to take the shot. Each team shoots five shots. Since she is usually so calm, I could picture the coach making her the anchor. So, when I heard she was taking a PK, I knew they would make her shot five. And she was.
I prayed for her to be calm, have peace regardless of the outcome but, I also prayed that she make her shot. Our first player missed, the other team made their shot. The next three girls for each side scored. Kat stepped up to take her shot. We were behind 3 goals to 4. The pressure was all on her. Hit it, each team picks another player in sudden death. Miss it and we go home. As team photographer, I focused the camera on her, and never moved. She watched the ref waiting for her to blow the whistle giving her the green light to shoot. She ran up to the ball and kicked. Through the camera I saw her hands shoot up and in the background saw her team jumping in the air. YES!! She made it.
The other team missed their shot, and we went into sudden death. I'll spare the drama and say we won the shootout and advanced to the finals today. Unfortunatley, we lost 2-1. I was not bothered by the loss, it was a close game and the girls played well. I'll always be happy that she had that opportunity and that she succeeded. I'm super proud of her!!
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Barely keeping my eyes open
Every time I have a big project - no matter how much lead time I have before its due, inevitably there comes a few days were its all out to finish it. These are the times where the issues are clearest, my writing is succinct and I'm exhausted and off schedule. This is the week.
A few early morning rises (3:30 a.m.) got a big chunk of the framework done. But I was never able to get a good head of steam going. Getting kids up and dressed, stopping by the school to check on a child who was debating staying the day or coming home, and the transportation to tryouts, practice, game, game, tryouts, practice, grocery shopping, work, complete job application, dance, practice dance, practice, . . .. Notice there is no sleep - I think I've just napped and refueled on coffee this week. My body is feeling the effects and I have a 10k to run in the morning. Seriously considering bailing on my friend.
Since stepping on the scale to good news on Monday, I'm happy to stay in blissful ignorance until two weeks from now. Mark and I haven't spent much time together - I know he has shared some things about his new job, but I have no active memory of what he said. And, dare I say it, I don't really care. My focus is on my case and my case only. Except now, while I'm waiting for the next round of caffeine to kick in. I'm praying that Ry can make it through the day with no issues.
His first basketball practice starts tomorrow night - yes, he made the local team. We knew that calls would come by Tuesday night, but it was a practice and dance night. Ry joined K's practice with the coach's son and spent a hour running around to burn off his nervous energy. Then, after we dropped K at dance, I called the machine. The coach had called and wanted to speak with Ry directly. What?!?
Ry is not an experienced phone talker, so before calling back we talked about the best responses. For good news - an enthusiastic "thank you" was appropriate. For bad news - something like "thank you for the opportunity" "I had fun trying out" and "good luck on the season, Coach" were some of the agreed-upon responses. Then speculation set in.
Ryan reasoned that if the Coach wanted to talk directly to him then it was probably bad news and the Coach just wanted to let him know he did a good job and to encourage him to keep playing. We talked about God's will and sometimes not getting what we want. We talked about faith and how we want to have faith that God can do anything, but must accept that His will may be different than ours. Then the phone rang. I answered and passed the phone back to Ryan. Coach let him know he made the team - silence - then a quiet "thanks." Coach said we're going to have a lot of fun this season "ah-huh" was the response. He then asked "are you ready to work hard?" "Mmm-huh." Can I talk to you mom again? "yup" - So much for enthusiatic response. But, then he did the happy dance.
After I hung up, he said, while you were talking to Coach I prayed and thanked God for helping me make the team, because there was no way I would have made it without Him. I love that kid!!
"I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." Matthew 17:20
A few early morning rises (3:30 a.m.) got a big chunk of the framework done. But I was never able to get a good head of steam going. Getting kids up and dressed, stopping by the school to check on a child who was debating staying the day or coming home, and the transportation to tryouts, practice, game, game, tryouts, practice, grocery shopping, work, complete job application, dance, practice dance, practice, . . .. Notice there is no sleep - I think I've just napped and refueled on coffee this week. My body is feeling the effects and I have a 10k to run in the morning. Seriously considering bailing on my friend.
Since stepping on the scale to good news on Monday, I'm happy to stay in blissful ignorance until two weeks from now. Mark and I haven't spent much time together - I know he has shared some things about his new job, but I have no active memory of what he said. And, dare I say it, I don't really care. My focus is on my case and my case only. Except now, while I'm waiting for the next round of caffeine to kick in. I'm praying that Ry can make it through the day with no issues.
His first basketball practice starts tomorrow night - yes, he made the local team. We knew that calls would come by Tuesday night, but it was a practice and dance night. Ry joined K's practice with the coach's son and spent a hour running around to burn off his nervous energy. Then, after we dropped K at dance, I called the machine. The coach had called and wanted to speak with Ry directly. What?!?
Ry is not an experienced phone talker, so before calling back we talked about the best responses. For good news - an enthusiastic "thank you" was appropriate. For bad news - something like "thank you for the opportunity" "I had fun trying out" and "good luck on the season, Coach" were some of the agreed-upon responses. Then speculation set in.
Ryan reasoned that if the Coach wanted to talk directly to him then it was probably bad news and the Coach just wanted to let him know he did a good job and to encourage him to keep playing. We talked about God's will and sometimes not getting what we want. We talked about faith and how we want to have faith that God can do anything, but must accept that His will may be different than ours. Then the phone rang. I answered and passed the phone back to Ryan. Coach let him know he made the team - silence - then a quiet "thanks." Coach said we're going to have a lot of fun this season "ah-huh" was the response. He then asked "are you ready to work hard?" "Mmm-huh." Can I talk to you mom again? "yup" - So much for enthusiatic response. But, then he did the happy dance.
After I hung up, he said, while you were talking to Coach I prayed and thanked God for helping me make the team, because there was no way I would have made it without Him. I love that kid!!
"I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." Matthew 17:20
Monday, October 22, 2012
A Fresh Start
This weekend was a weekend off. I did not plan to take the weekend off, but by Friday I just declared it so.
I didn't count calories, I didn't exercise, I didn't log my food, and I ate take out... alot! McDonalds (twice), Chinese and Panera bread, including a bagel or two at my home. I even had a margarita for dinner on Saturday night. No food - just a margarita. So, when I weighed in today, I was prepared for a 5 plus pound gain. But, I was down 5 pounds! WHAT?!?
This makes 21 pounds gone. Hey, I'll take it.
I read Karen's blog and saw that she too was indulging in treats too. She identified that it is no good to deny a type of food entirely, but that it should be reserved for something special. I totally agree. But, the truth is, even a small respite from healthy eating is good for the soul, even if its not good for the mid section. I'm back on board with my exercise, and eating plan and my reading again. I'll just start after one more sausage and egg panini.
I didn't count calories, I didn't exercise, I didn't log my food, and I ate take out... alot! McDonalds (twice), Chinese and Panera bread, including a bagel or two at my home. I even had a margarita for dinner on Saturday night. No food - just a margarita. So, when I weighed in today, I was prepared for a 5 plus pound gain. But, I was down 5 pounds! WHAT?!?
This makes 21 pounds gone. Hey, I'll take it.
I read Karen's blog and saw that she too was indulging in treats too. She identified that it is no good to deny a type of food entirely, but that it should be reserved for something special. I totally agree. But, the truth is, even a small respite from healthy eating is good for the soul, even if its not good for the mid section. I'm back on board with my exercise, and eating plan and my reading again. I'll just start after one more sausage and egg panini.
Thursday, October 18, 2012
The Scales are moving
After a month of flirting with the same pound or two, I was delighted to see a three pound loss this morning. I wish I could say that it came after a fantastic workout yesterday, but no. I struggled through my workout and didn't get up at all this morning to do anything - even to walk. Today is definately an "I don't wanna" day.
I have a huge project to complete, which is one of my favorite kinds, I just can't seem to get it done. It's about 80% done, and I've just spent hours and hours manipulating this 80% rather than pushing it over the finish line. History tells me and this time is no exception, that I get the munchies when I get stuck at the 80% line. I stayed home Monday and Tuesday to work on it, but only snacked and stalled. Yesterday I came to work and did a little, but still am behind.
I have to dig deeper to get this done so I can continue with my training. I have a 60 minute run to complete today, plus Ryan has soccer practice in the middle of my training time. Just be thankful for one thing today - and that thing is 3 pounds gone!!
I have a huge project to complete, which is one of my favorite kinds, I just can't seem to get it done. It's about 80% done, and I've just spent hours and hours manipulating this 80% rather than pushing it over the finish line. History tells me and this time is no exception, that I get the munchies when I get stuck at the 80% line. I stayed home Monday and Tuesday to work on it, but only snacked and stalled. Yesterday I came to work and did a little, but still am behind.
I have to dig deeper to get this done so I can continue with my training. I have a 60 minute run to complete today, plus Ryan has soccer practice in the middle of my training time. Just be thankful for one thing today - and that thing is 3 pounds gone!!
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
My Faith Story - Watch
As I fly through my reading, I am reminded of my next word in My Faith Story: Watch.
After Jesus and the disciples had their last supper, Judas left the group on a mission to betray Jesus to the Pharasees. Jesus took his closest disciples with him: Peter, James and John and asked them to keep watch while he went to pray. During that time Jesus asked God to take the cup from him, meaning that if there was any way to save the human race other than for him to suffer and die, then could God not require him to die. After he returned from praying he discovered that they were all asleep. He rebuked them asking why they couldn't stay awake for just one hour, and went back to pray. Again he asked God to relieve him of the responsibility of dying for us, but resigned himself that he was going to follow God's plan, not his own, and so he returned to his disciples only to discover that they had dozed off again. This time he informed them it was time.
My old church had a ritual of keeping watch overnight on the Thursday before Good Friday. People would sign up for blocks of time to sit in the church and pray. While I was still in high school, I signed up for an hour. When I arrived, there was one other person in the church. I selected a seat away from them and began to pray silently. Soon, I could hear that person leaving. I was all alone. I was not frightened, but felt very responsible for having been trusted to keep watch. I didn't know Jesus as Lord or Savior then. But, I knew I was where I was supposed to be. During this hour, on several occasions, I felt what can only be described as comforting chills. A warm feeling that starts at my head and resonates down my body. It's one of the most cherished feelings in the world. After some research over the years, others have also commented that they believe that the chills mean that my body can sense the presence of the Holy Spirit. I stayed and prayed until the next person arrived. Then once relieved of my post, I returned home. Again, at that time, I was not saved. But, I believed even then that I was special to God.
Another time, a couple of years ago, Mark and I were attending the Weekend to Remember. Our volunteer team would gather in the prayer room during that part of the program where the leaders present the Gospel message. We would pray for various things but mostly that hearts would be open. At one particular point, someone was praying and invited the Holy Spirit to be present. I immediately felt the chills and knew that He was here. Later, Mark commented that even he felt it. Whenever I get that feeling, I smile remembering that night in the church, when the Holy Spirit was there with me as I stayed awake and kept watch for God.
After Jesus and the disciples had their last supper, Judas left the group on a mission to betray Jesus to the Pharasees. Jesus took his closest disciples with him: Peter, James and John and asked them to keep watch while he went to pray. During that time Jesus asked God to take the cup from him, meaning that if there was any way to save the human race other than for him to suffer and die, then could God not require him to die. After he returned from praying he discovered that they were all asleep. He rebuked them asking why they couldn't stay awake for just one hour, and went back to pray. Again he asked God to relieve him of the responsibility of dying for us, but resigned himself that he was going to follow God's plan, not his own, and so he returned to his disciples only to discover that they had dozed off again. This time he informed them it was time.
My old church had a ritual of keeping watch overnight on the Thursday before Good Friday. People would sign up for blocks of time to sit in the church and pray. While I was still in high school, I signed up for an hour. When I arrived, there was one other person in the church. I selected a seat away from them and began to pray silently. Soon, I could hear that person leaving. I was all alone. I was not frightened, but felt very responsible for having been trusted to keep watch. I didn't know Jesus as Lord or Savior then. But, I knew I was where I was supposed to be. During this hour, on several occasions, I felt what can only be described as comforting chills. A warm feeling that starts at my head and resonates down my body. It's one of the most cherished feelings in the world. After some research over the years, others have also commented that they believe that the chills mean that my body can sense the presence of the Holy Spirit. I stayed and prayed until the next person arrived. Then once relieved of my post, I returned home. Again, at that time, I was not saved. But, I believed even then that I was special to God.
Another time, a couple of years ago, Mark and I were attending the Weekend to Remember. Our volunteer team would gather in the prayer room during that part of the program where the leaders present the Gospel message. We would pray for various things but mostly that hearts would be open. At one particular point, someone was praying and invited the Holy Spirit to be present. I immediately felt the chills and knew that He was here. Later, Mark commented that even he felt it. Whenever I get that feeling, I smile remembering that night in the church, when the Holy Spirit was there with me as I stayed awake and kept watch for God.
Passing the Minutes
About a week ago, I changed my strategy for running. I now run for a pre-set number of minutes not a set number of miles. Last week I ran 20 miles. This week I'm on pace to complete 27 miles. At times that just blows my mind. Other times I am discouraged that I still run slow. I'm trusting the program and building up an aerobic base. It is getting easier to run 6-8 minutes in a row, and my heart rate is lower when I do - on average less than 165. This is a good leap from the Salem race, where I could only run 3-4 minutes and my heartbeat would be up in the realm of 180 bpm. I know it will take time.
To say that I'm enjoying it would be a lie. There is nothing "fun" about running for me. It is a means to an end - that awesome medal - hey, it's all about the bling. I use goal times to motivate me to keep going. To be honest, I've never really pushed myself during any half marathon. Disney, I just wanted to finish. I didn't train, and so I took the extra time allowed by Mark's speed run to just get er done. In Salem, I started the hour early with the walkers and didn't even begin to run until mile 3 or 4. So, Vegas will be my first real attempt to complete a half.
On the downside, the scale hasn't moved in a month. I see that my body is changing - some clothes fit better and others - like my fat jeans hang off of me. I can put them on and off without unbuttoning them. Yet, I'm not able to get into the next size jeans yet. Patience, I keep telling myself. But, it is getting a little frustrating. I added calories and then ate less, but there was no movement. I've switched up my routine, still nothing. I'm convinced that God has stopped the scale so I can get my priorites straight.
As I mentioned yesterday, God hardened the heart of Pharoh until he ultimately let the Israelites go. Certainly, God can stop my weightloss until I get back into reading the Bible. After all, that is what this blog is about - my journey through the Bible. But, I have a tendancy to make it all about the weightloss. I'm glad He's making sure that I don't this time.
Yesterday, I read that for each pound I lose, I should be able to run 2 seconds faster per mile. My goal is to get another 30 off by the marathon to get back a minute per mile. That would be sweet! Until then, I need to lay off the sweets - which gets tempting as Halloween approaches and our house becomes candy central. I've decided that to say I won't indulge it foolish - I know I will. So, instead I'll pick just one type of candy, and just eat that. I'll choose one that we don't buy to give away and one that the kids don't really eat. That would be butterfingers - my mouth is watering just thinking about it. But, Halloween is still over two weeks away. No sweets until then...
To say that I'm enjoying it would be a lie. There is nothing "fun" about running for me. It is a means to an end - that awesome medal - hey, it's all about the bling. I use goal times to motivate me to keep going. To be honest, I've never really pushed myself during any half marathon. Disney, I just wanted to finish. I didn't train, and so I took the extra time allowed by Mark's speed run to just get er done. In Salem, I started the hour early with the walkers and didn't even begin to run until mile 3 or 4. So, Vegas will be my first real attempt to complete a half.
On the downside, the scale hasn't moved in a month. I see that my body is changing - some clothes fit better and others - like my fat jeans hang off of me. I can put them on and off without unbuttoning them. Yet, I'm not able to get into the next size jeans yet. Patience, I keep telling myself. But, it is getting a little frustrating. I added calories and then ate less, but there was no movement. I've switched up my routine, still nothing. I'm convinced that God has stopped the scale so I can get my priorites straight.
As I mentioned yesterday, God hardened the heart of Pharoh until he ultimately let the Israelites go. Certainly, God can stop my weightloss until I get back into reading the Bible. After all, that is what this blog is about - my journey through the Bible. But, I have a tendancy to make it all about the weightloss. I'm glad He's making sure that I don't this time.
Yesterday, I read that for each pound I lose, I should be able to run 2 seconds faster per mile. My goal is to get another 30 off by the marathon to get back a minute per mile. That would be sweet! Until then, I need to lay off the sweets - which gets tempting as Halloween approaches and our house becomes candy central. I've decided that to say I won't indulge it foolish - I know I will. So, instead I'll pick just one type of candy, and just eat that. I'll choose one that we don't buy to give away and one that the kids don't really eat. That would be butterfingers - my mouth is watering just thinking about it. But, Halloween is still over two weeks away. No sweets until then...
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